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Be In The World But Not Of It

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Jesus preached to ‘be in the world but not of it’.

 

Buddha had similar instructions, though put differently. He told his followers the world was full of suffering. And so they had to transcend worldly concerns if they were to transcend suffering.

 

And since then there have been many wise sages who’ve given the same kind of advice.

 

Positive thinking and meditation are two of the modern ways that people are attempting to achieve this ‘mystical’ state. But they are also misunderstood by most people.

 

The result of your thinking should be positive, but that doesn’t mean ignoring or denying ‘negative’ aspects.

 

Meditation is useful. It will calm your mind down, but if your mind is chaotic, you won’t be able to meditate effectively.

 

So here is the best solution – as I see it.

 

Your life is your work of art. And as an artist, it’s your job to decide what you are going to create and the raw materials you are going to use. The world around you brings you endless inspiration and raw materials. Your work is to select which bits you want in your artwork… and then use and develop them into the form you want them to be in.

 

The world around you is only there for your inspiration. It works according to certain universal and immutable Laws. However none of us are anywhere close to understanding these… so we have clumsily tried to take the fragments we know and frame life into our ill-considered rules.

 

So the world we see is governed by artificial man-made laws, conventions and codes that change with evolving tastes and trends.

 

To be governed by these traps you into being ‘in the world’. It does this by limiting your potential and possibilities to what the currently understands. Which is only the tip of the iceberg.

 

Every advancement, whether it is artistic, commercial, social or scientific in nature, originates from a refusal to be bound by ‘conventional wisdom’.

 

If you paint your picture by numbers using the template the world gives you… you are bound by the world and so of it.

 

The secret to a happy and successful life… is being able to dip in and out of it. That might sound a little weird, but here’s what it means…

 

You have to dip into the world and revel in it’s experiences, but remain able to remove yourself from it. You do this every day anyway… when you sleep. You go about your everyday business, until you get so tired you need sleep to refresh yourself for more experiences.

 

In the same way you have to be able to refresh yourself emotionally. As and when you choose.

 

Imagine you got onto a train and the train hurtled past your stop – and all the other stops – until it collided with another.

 

Without the ability to dip in and out of your life that is exactly what happens to you emotionally. Because you have given up your ability to decide where you get on and off. And so you get taken way past the point that’s comfortable for you. And then you just feel bewildered and lost… and stuck.

 

Now all of this has been a little abstract and airy fairy so far. So let’s use a concrete example.

 

Say your marriage has been a little rocky recently. Maybe you have had little time to be together. And when you do… you’re both tired, tetchy and pre-occupied. Now if you carry on living your life in the way that the world seems to demand of you… the relationship will probably get worse. You’ll grow apart, blame each other for the situation, justify your role and become bitter, resentful… and further apart.

 

Now if you were to dip in and out, you’d notice when the relationship lost it’s sparkle. Using the earlier analogy… you’d get off the train. Then you’d take a step back to work out what was wrong and how to fix it. Then you’d get another train in the direction you need to go in… until you realized you need to get off again.

 

It doesn’t matter what the issue is. It could just as easily be a parenting issue… a work situation… or any of a hundred different scenarios. Whatever the context… if you feel bad it’s because you stayed on the train past your stop.

 

You see in life you are always going to want many different goals. Your success depends on your ability to step back, find the best route and follow it.

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1 Lisa

Re: Meditation

I’ve been practicing simple breathing meditation for about four years. I do some each day. My mind is chaotic – habitually. Pema Chodron states that meditation is not necessarily practiced in order to cultivate a clean, clear, relaxed mind (although that can be a side-effect), but to learn to sit with ourselves, to be “steadfast” with ourselves – through our neurosis and our wisdom. To learn to watch ourselves and our patterns. She instructs us to non-judgementally label our thoughts as they arise: “thinking” – to touch it gently, like popping a bubble…and then to come back to the breathing. It is interesting how when we are sitting with ourselves, at a most fundamental state, with our breath, how uncomfortable it can be. The teachings tell us to just stay. Stay when we want to get up. Stay when we want to check the clock or make a sandwich. Stay with ourselves. Be with ourselves. In time, accept ourselves.

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