From the conventional romantic perspective of relationships, an argument is a failure. It is a failure because it shows a split, where the aim is for two to be as one… with a shared mind and shared thoughts.

Actually though, differences are the way that you and your relationship are strengthened. We become stronger when we are more inclusive. God, the force of life, or whatever terminology you wish to use, includes everything – the good and the bad – the more we can embrace the closer to God we become.

The more ideas, facts, people and situations that remain outside of us… the more potential there is to cause us problems.

The purpose of relationships - and everything in life is in relation to you - is to provide a continual source of growth. Eventually the two become one. Not in the sense of sharing the same mind and opinions, but through becoming inclusive enough to embrace and accept the others opinions as an equally valid choice. This then moves us towards the relationship God has with us.

The conventional view assumes that there is only one right way. So when Mr Smith thinks A is best and Mrs Smith thinks B… it appears that one must be right and the other wrong. Therefore each must argue their case for all they are worth. If they don’t then they risk being annihilated in the sense that their idea – which symbolises them – becomes consumed by the other.

If, however we allowed the possibility that both could be right… you are forced to find a more inclusive understanding that embraces both perspectives. This attitude leads to more inclusiveness and so more growth… each Partner is more respected and validated giving them the foundation to explore more deeply and continually grow.